“Saturday Night Live” this week pondered what life behind bars might look like for embattled celebrities Lori Loughlin, Michael Avenatti, Julian Assange and Tekashi 6ix9ine.
In a spoof of MSNBC’s reality show “Lockup,” Kate McKinnon portrayed a tough Loughlin, the actor who is charged with fraud for allegedly paying $500,000 in bribes to help her two daughters get into the University of Southern California.
Loughlin stood tough as she met with common criminals who challenged tested her mettle.
“I’m a loco,” she proclaimed.
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BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, left, leaves as her husband Mossimo Giannulli, right, trails behind her outside of the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Jessica Rinaldi/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Mossimo Giannulli, left, husband of actress Lori Loughlin, follows her out of the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Pat Greenhouse/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, in tan at right, and her husband Mossimo Giannulli, in green tie behind her, leave the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Jessica Rinaldi/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, in tan at right, and her husband Mossimo Giannulli, in green tie behind her, leave the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Jessica Rinaldi/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, center in tan, and her husband Mossimo Giannulli, in green tie behind her, leave the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Jessica Rinaldi/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, in tan at center, leaves as her husband Mossimo Giannulli, in green tie at right, follows behind her outside the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Jessica Rinaldi/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, center in tan, and her husband Mossimo Giannulli, in green tie behind her, leave the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Pat Greenhouse/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
Actress Lori Loughlin, center, exits federal court in Boston, Massachusetts, U.S., on Wednesday, April 3, 2019. Wealthy parents appeared in court as the clock ticks down on plea bargains for their alleged role in the biggest college admissions scam the Justice Department has ever prosecuted. Photographer: Scott Eisen/Bloomberg via Getty Images
Actress Lori Loughlin, center, exits federal court in Boston, Massachusetts, U.S., on Wednesday, April 3, 2019. Wealthy parents appeared in court as the clock ticks down on plea bargains for their alleged role in the biggest college admissions scam the Justice Department has ever prosecuted. Photographer: Scott Eisen/Bloomberg via Getty Images
Actress Lori Loughlin, right, exits federal court in Boston, Massachusetts, U.S., on Wednesday, April 3, 2019. Wealthy parents appeared in court as the clock ticks down on plea bargains for their alleged role in the biggest college admissions scam the Justice Department has ever prosecuted. Photographer: Scott Eisen/Bloomberg via Getty Images
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 03: Lori Loughlin exits the John Joseph Moakley U.S. Courthouse after appearing in Federal Court to answer charges stemming from college admissions scandal on April 3, 2019 in Boston, Massachusetts. (Photo by Paul Marotta/Getty Images)
Actress Lori Loughlin exits the courthouse after facing charges for allegedly conspiring to commit mail fraud and other charges in the college admissions scandal at the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. (Photo by Joseph Prezioso / AFP) (Photo credit should read JOSEPH PREZIOSO/AFP/Getty Images)
Actress Lori Loughlin exits the courthouse after facing charges for allegedly conspiring to commit mail fraud and other charges in the college admissions scandal at the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. (Photo by Joseph Prezioso / AFP) (Photo credit should read JOSEPH PREZIOSO/AFP/Getty Images)
Actress Lori Loughlin exits the courthouse after facing charges for allegedly conspiring to commit mail fraud and other charges in the college admissions scandal at the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. (Photo by Joseph Prezioso / AFP) (Photo credit should read JOSEPH PREZIOSO/AFP/Getty Images)
Actress Lori Loughlin exits the courthouse after facing charges for allegedly conspiring to commit mail fraud and other charges in the college admissions scandal at the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. (Photo by Joseph Prezioso / AFP) (Photo credit should read JOSEPH PREZIOSO/AFP/Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin heads into the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Pat Greenhouse/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
BOSTON, MA – APRIL 3: Actress Lori Loughlin, center, arrives at the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston on April 3, 2019. Hollywood stars Felicity Huffman and Lori Loughlin were among 13 parents scheduled to appear in federal court in Boston Wednesday for the first time since they were charged last month in a massive college admissions cheating scandal. They were among 50 people – including coaches, powerful financiers, and entrepreneurs – charged in a brazen plot in which wealthy parents allegedly schemed to bribe sports coaches at top colleges to admit their children. Many of the parents allegedly paid to have someone else take the SAT or ACT exams for their children or correct their answers, guaranteeing them high scores. (Photo by Jessica Rinaldi/The Boston Globe via Getty Images)
Actress Lori Loughlin (C) arrives at the court to appear before Judge M. Page Kelley to face charge for allegedly conspiring to commit mail fraud and other charges in the college admissions scandal at the John Joseph Moakley United States Courthouse in Boston, Massachusetts on April 3, 2019. (Photo by Joseph Prezioso / AFP) (Photo credit should read JOSEPH PREZIOSO/AFP/Getty Images)
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Her cellmates grew more impressed by the $500,000 bribe allegation and what Loughlin said was one daughter’s communication major.
“She’s an influencer on Instagram,” she said.
“Guards,” a fellow inmate said, “get her away from me.”
Loughlin continued to impress with hard-life credibility: “You think prison is hard, I have done 68 Hallmark movies.”
She was joined by attorney Michael Avenatti, accused of embezzling millions of dollars from a client, Wikileaks founder Julian Assange, charged with conspiring to hack into secret files and Tekashi 6ix9ine, arrested late least year on racketeering and firearms charges.
Avenatti and Assange have said they are innocent; Tekashi 6ix9ine pleaded guilty early this year.
In the skit Avenatti, portrayed by Pete Davidson, established his street credibility by saying, “I’m so shady that a porn star once said that she needs to distance herself from me.”
He was referring to Stormy Daniels, the adult performer who said she had a liaison with President Trump in 2006.
Michael Keaton made a special appearance to portray Assange. He said, “I know everything, baby,” because he has access to the world’s private computer files.
Tekashi 6ix9ine, played by Melissa Villaseñor, turned out to be the tamest cellmate.
“You here for something crazy?” one of the inmates asked.
“Nah,” he said, “just robbery and gun stuff.”
News segment “Weekend Update” had more fun with Assange’s arrest this week at the Ecuadorian Embassy in London.
President Trump said, “I know nothing about WikiLeaks.” But during his campaign for president he trumpeted the Wikileaks’ exposure of emails hacked from the campaign of opponent Hillary Clinton.
“You’re more obsessed with Wikileaks than this audience is with BTS,” said “Weekend Update” co-host Colin Jost, referring to the night’s musical guest, a K-pop act with rabid fans.
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WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange makes a speech from the balcony of the Ecuadorian Embassy, in central London, Britain February 5, 2016. REUTERS/Peter Nicholls/Files
A supporter of Wikileaks founder Julian Assange holds a banner outside the Ecuadorian embassy in London as he marks three years since Assange claimed asylum in the embassy on June 19, 2015. WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange clocks up three years inside the Ecuadoran embassy in London today, after claiming that Swedish prosecutors cancelled a landmark meeting in his case earlier this week. AFP PHOTO / JUSTIN TALLIS (Photo credit should read JUSTIN TALLIS/AFP/Getty Images)
A supporter of Wikileaks founder Julian Assange holds banners outside the Ecuadorian embassy in London as he marks three years since Assange claimed asylum in the embassy on June 19, 2015. WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange clocks up three years inside the Ecuadoran embassy in London today, after claiming that Swedish prosecutors cancelled a landmark meeting in his case earlier this week.
AFP PHOTO / JUSTIN TALLIS (Photo credit should read JUSTIN TALLIS/AFP/Getty Images)
Julian Assange, Founder and Editor-in-Chief of WikiLeaks speaks via video link during a press conference on the occasion of the ten year anniversary celebration of WikiLeaks in Berlin, Germany, October 4, 2016. REUTERS/Axel Schmidt TPX IMAGES OF THE DAY
WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange appears on screen via video link during his participation as a guest panelist in an International Seminar on the 60th anniversary of the college of Journalists of Chile in Santiago, Chile, July 12, 2016. REUTERS/Rodrigo Garrido
File photo dated 05/02/16 of WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange, who will publish more confidential documents on the US Central Intelligence Agency once a “key attack code” has been disarmed, he has revealed.
File photo dated 5/2/2016 of Julian Assange who has defended the release of emails by WikiLeaks about US presidential candidate Hillary Clinton.
WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange speaking from the balcony of the Ecuadorian Embassy in London where he has been living for more than three years after the country granted him political asylum.
BERLIN, GERMANY – OCTOBER 4: WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange participates via video link at a news conference marking the 10th anniversary of the secrecy-spilling group in Berlin, Germany on October 4, 2016.
(Photo by Maurizio Gambarini/Anadolu Agency/Getty Images)
The Spanish journalist Ignacio Ramonet presents in Quito, Ecuador, on June 23, 2016 the Ecuador ‘s book ” When Google found Wikileaks”. Julian Assange made his appearance to the world in 2010 with the publication by WikiLeaks of thousands of secret documents revealing conspiracies , corruption, crimes , lies, and incriminate several governments and particularly the United States as the main actor illegalities. (Photo by Rafael Rodr�uez/ACGPHOTO/NurPhoto via Getty Images)
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 05: Wikileaks founder Julian Assange prepares to speak from the balcony of the Ecuadorian embassy where he continues to seek asylum following an extradition request from Sweden in 2012, on February 5, 2016 in London, England. The United Nations Working Group on Arbitrary Detention has insisted that Mr Assange’s detention should be brought to an end. (Photo by Carl Court/Getty Images)
LONDON, ENGLAND – FEBRUARY 05: A panel of WikiLeaks representitives and press look on as WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange speaks at a press conference at the Frontline Club via video link from the Ecuadorian Embassy in London on 5 February 2016 in London, England. Mr Assange’s speech comes a day after it was announced that the UN panel ruled he was being unlawfully detained at the Ecuadorian Embassy. (Photo by Chris Ratcliffe/Getty Images)
Australian founder of whistleblowing website, ‘WikiLeaks’, Julian Assange speaks to media after giving a press conference in London on July 26, 2010. The founder of a website which published tens of thousands of leaked military files about the war in Afghanistan said Monday they showed that the ‘course of the war needs to change’. In all, some 92,000 documents dating back to 2004 were released by the whistleblowers’ website Wikileaks to the New York Times, Britain’s Guardian newspaper, and Germany’s Der Spiegel news weekly. Assange also used a press conference in London to dismiss the White House’s furious reaction to the disclosures. AFP PHOTO/Leon Neal (Photo credit should read LEON NEAL/AFP/Getty Images)
MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA – MAY 21: (AUSTRALIA OUT) Wikileaks founder Julian Assange poses during a portrait shoot on May 21, 2010 in Melbourne, Australia. (Photo by Mark Chew/Fairfax Media/Fairfax Media via Getty Images).
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Co-host Michael Che had more criticism for Trump after the president considered dumping undocumented immigrants in so-called sanctuary cities, like New York.
“What’s the message,” he said, “have some more voters? You can’t scare us with more immigrants. That just means faster Ubers.”
Academy Award winner Emma Stone hosted the show for the fourth time.
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